Realization

Today I once again begin a new journey; this one is called Optimism and disgust to become fit.

All this is, is a life style change. Let me start at why: I was compared today to a girl who I consider huge, and I usually do not judge so harshly but that is just how big I think this girl is. More than one person today told me I am about the same size as this girl. This was heart breaking, I nearly cried; the only thing that stopped me from doing so is who I was with. You may think I am over reacting or that I must have seen it, but the truth is I really didn't know I am this big.

I quickly went from sad to outraged, this means that the basis of my entire existance could be not as i percieve it. I MUST do something about being a size that concerns the average on looker, a size in which a person seems to not be able to reach their own shoes, a size where confidence is scarce and comfort has been long forgotten. Don't get me wrong I know some people enjoy being as big as I am or even bigger and more power to them! But I am uncomfortable in my skin, and this comment today made me finaly see why, it's not because of the clothes, the establishment or my personality ( the most common excuses I make for various disapointing situations) it's because of my body.

So for lint, forever hopefully I am giving up eating out, as well as any beverage besides water and pure juices. I have also decided I must take at the very least 3 one hour walks a week. Ideally though this will last forever and I'll take a walk every morning and every evening and be in a bikini by next summer but I know that that is not going to be the case.. at least not right away.

The hardest part of doing this will be avoiding all of the shindigs; because that I am almost certain, is impossible living with and near my family. But optimisim is the first part of my new journey. Well it is after midnight and I have class in the morning.

Wish me luck, Pleasant Slumber =)
Veronica Pickles DAY 1